______ ______  _____  ______   ______ _     _ ______     ____  
  _  (_____ \_____ \/_____\(______\ /______(_)   (_)______\   (  __)  _
 (_)  _____) )____) )     _ _     _ _     _ _     _ _     _    \ \   (_)  
 (_) |  ____/  __  / |   | | |   | | |   | | |   | | |   | |    \ \  (_)
 (_) | |    | |  \ \ |___| | |   | | |___| | |___| | |   | |_____) ) (_)
     |_|    |_|   \_\_____/|_|   |_|\_____/ \_____/|_|   |_|______/ 

my pronouns are *e/h*/h*/h*s/h*self. they only work when used in text-based 
communication, and that's intentional--in spoken conversation, I don't like 
going by any pronouns at all. if you respect me even slightly, either use 
these pronouns or refer to me by name. surely "baz" isn't that hard to use, 
if nothing else, yeah?

potential questions you may have:

"how did you come up with this shit?" * I found them online. they were made 
as a joke for some 90s chat software that I've never used. they're also 
called "splat pronouns", a name much easier to look up. feel free to 
replace the asterisks with whatever other unicode symbols work for the 
platform/you think are cool--but try to avoid emoji or anything else that 
would be rendered in full-color. 

"how do you use them in context?" * that's baz. *e is trying to work on 
something. it seems like *e's having trouble with h* website. something 
about it is giving h* problems. sucks for h*, those burdens are h*s to 
bear. *e'll probably figure out what's wrong with it by h*self.

"why do you have to be an annoying queer?" * it's not like I was given a 
lot of options otherwise.